Self-betrayal is the ways that I turn my back on my Self and refuse to honor Who I Am.
It is when I don’t wait for clarity, but jump into things because that feels easier, more comfortable. It is saying “yes” when I already know I can’t follow through or don’t want to with my full Self. It is also saying “no” because yes means peering into dark corners of my Self.
Self-betrayal is turning away from the nibbling of knowledge at the edge of my consciousness because turning towards it means seeing, right behind it, a cavernous black hole that threatens to suck me in. It is setting a course and following it, regardless of the signs along the way that direct me to go a different direction.
Most of all, Self-betrayal is allowing my heart to be padded, protected, numbed even to those I hold dear.
Ease, comfort, oblivion… they tempt me away from honoring my Self.
I breathe deep, I straighten my back and lift my chin. In the spirit of the Reiki Principles, I tell myself: Just for today… I will align myself with the highest energy of my Self, and look where I fear, feel what I would not risk, know what is present, and honor my Self in each moment.